Bella Roma

Have you ever not wanted to do something because it’s your first time and you don’t know what the hell you are doing?! Yep, hate to admit it but it’s true….

Follow me each step of the way…

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Step 1: Glance (much too quickly) on the internet at Roma metro map to know which station to enter and which to exit. Enter station and buy a ticket for the wrong direction. Lesson = 1 Euro.Step 2: Laugh at self, exit and re-enter on correct side. Buy 2nd ticket for second Euro. Total trip = 2 Euro. Ok, still a good deal.

Step 3: Wait for train listening to iPod, studying your Italian. Stand tall, look good, pretend you are not hot as you feel the twinges of perspiration initiating themselves.

Step 4: As train pulls in, admire colorful, artistic grafitti. It’s everywhere but here we have a close up of the pasttime which touches all parts Rome.

Step 4b: Enter train and smell disgusting horse-like smell. Cringe, grimace-laugh, then hold breath and wait for train to move. Stay near door and window for maximum air movement. Breathe again. Cost =2 Euro and oxygen.

Step 5: Strategize foothold & full stance for combo elegance & assured security of purse. Ignore sweat rolling down back. Continue Italian lessons on iPod while people watching.

Step 6: Regardless of others entering train who try to get your space, keep near door and maintain calm. Don’t freak with crowd or horrifying humidity or further sweat down back. Cost = 2 Euro, oxygen and water.

Step 7: As train rolls to stop at your exit, position self. Jump out immediately at exit to enjoy cool underground air regardless of grime, it’s better than inside that train!

Step 8: Follow signs to Piazza Repubblica & brilliantly sigh with your accomplishment as you arrive above ground! Ahhhh, Bella Roma!!!

Total trip cost = 2 Euro, oxygen mask, water, deodorant.

Bonus = Gelato upon exit! Buono!

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